Prayer. I often beat myself up because I feel like I do not spend enough time in prayer. Yes, I know, prayer is not simply sitting in silence and conversing with God. It can be so much more.
- Prayer is seeing something beautiful and taking a moment to savor its beauty.
- Prayer is spending time with your children, looking into their eyes and relishing the moment.
- Prayer is visiting someone who needs another person present to listen.
I am finding that praying for a specific need makes me a little uncomfortable. If I am in pain from my neck injury I don’t want to ask God to “take away my neck pain.” I want to pray for the strength to get through the pain.
If my friend is going on a job interview I don’t want to pray for that job to come through, I want to pray that the Lord’s “will be done.” That job may not be the best in the long run. Won’t I be praying that the other person up for the job does not get it?
As I have been through years of hemophilia with my sons, I know that I cannot ask God to “take away the hemophilia,” but I can ask him to help ease their pain, to help them recover from surgery, to help them work through the fear of needles and pain that sometimes takes weeks to get better.
Some would argue with me on this one. Yes, I can pray to God to take away hemophilia, but if I pray every day and it doesn’t happen does it mean I am not praying hard enough? Does it mean that God wants my boys to have hemophilia?
What about depression? I struggle with clinical depression. I take medications and have a psychiatrist and a counselor to make sure that I keep myself in check. There are actually people that say if I pray hard enough the depression will go away…and when it doesn’t go away, I’m not praying the way I should.
Sorry, I don’t think it works that way. I think there are just some things in this world that do not have an explanation. We have medications and physicians to help us with a number of maladies and I believe God has placed these people in our lives (because they have answered a calling to serve and heal) and if we don’t use them aren’t we basically denying what God is offering us?
Miracles happen. There are many instances of people being healed from illness without medical explanations. Some believe that prayer has truly been answered and the miraculous has indeed happened. I don’t doubt it. But I am deeply saddened to hear when those who are extremely devoted pray and pray and are faithful and their prayers are not answered in the way they hoped.
God had an answer, just not what they wanted.
God hears us. When we are saying our prayers and all is well and when we are at the deepest, darkest places of our soul. I don’t know the answers but I do know that when we continue to ask questions and keep the conversations going about why we believe what we believe we are able to move even closer to God.
Today I Am Thankful For
- Hospital visits
- Pickle jars
- Long fingernails
- Coffee in bed
- healing