2018 was filled with the good and the bad. I am just grateful that all the good came the last half of the year. It has been a fantastic Thanksgiving/Christmas season and I hate to start this week because it will all be over too soon.

I am glad that my One Word, flourish, was a word that rang true to myself and it carried me through some of the rough times. We moved to small town Texas and when I was doubting and wondering why we were led back to Texas, I soon realized that God’s plans are more phenomenal than we can comprehend. I can honestly say that I have flourished in many ways by living in my new home. I look back to a year ago when I could not wait for the holidays to be over to now being sad that the decorations will come down soon. God is good my friends.

I’ve contemplated my word for 2019 and there was only one that came to mind. It is a year to be transformed. I have taken control of my health and am on the right track but transforming is not just about the outside of a person. I want to transform my heart. I need to continue to heal my soul from past hurts and, yes, even attempt to forgive those who have wronged me and my family. Ugh. Hard stuff.

This year is about understanding my path and discerning my journey with my seminary studies. This education is transforming my mind and I want to take it a step further. And my spiritual life needs some help. I am hoping to read through the Bible this year, without judgment for missing the occasional day here and there. I want to dig into the scriptures and have the Word breathe new life into my soul. I need to be still and listen.

I look at my laundry list of things I want to happen this year and see that all these things have been on my lists from previous years, but there is something different about now. Why 2019? The scripture passage that will be my focus this year says it all:

There’s a season for everything
    and a time for every matter under the heavens:
²     a time for giving birth and a time for dying,
    a time for planting and a time for uprooting what was planted,
³     a time for killing and a time for healing,
    a time for tearing down and a time for building up,
⁴     a time for crying and a time for laughing,
    a time for mourning and a time for dancing,
⁵     a time for throwing stones and a time for gathering stones,
    a time for embracing and a time for avoiding embraces,
⁶     a time for searching and a time for losing,
    a time for keeping and a time for throwing away,
⁷     a time for tearing and a time for repairing,
    a time for keeping silent and a time for speaking,
⁸     a time for loving and a time for hating,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (CEB)

I find that I start each year with a fresh outlook and new attitude and have great plans to only have them fall away. Some years are better than others, but I find that too often I try to make things work and constantly run into stumbling blocks that keep me from being successful. It’s hard to realize and accept that sometimes my plans, the plans I have for my life are not happening in the right time. God’s time.

There is indeed a time for everything. A time to flourish and a time to struggle. A time to be joyful and a time to grieve. A time to be active and a time to rest. I feel God’s nudge on my heart and without a doubt I know that this is the time of transformation.

My hope and prayer for you, Beloved, is that you feel the nudge God puts on your heart and that you stop and listen.

Today I Am Thankful For:

1. homemade cinnamon rolls
2. snow
3. prayer beads
4. big pillows
5. hope