Most people who know me would probably say that I will always lend a helping hand when I can and that I tend to see the best in most situations. As an advocate, and in ministry these are things that help me to be successful most of the time. It’s just always been part of who I am.
If you know me well, you may know something different. I can hide out and withdraw and let depression eat me up. I will keep to myself because I am a natural introvert and meeting new people in unfamiliar surroundings really freaks me out.
But if you know me better than most, you know that for over a year I have been in physical pain. You won’t see it because I always manage to do what I need to do. When 5 o’clock rolls around, my workday is over, dinner is done, and I’m pretty done too. Taking a shower and being in bed by 6:30 or 7 is not a good thing for me but it’s been happening quite a bit over the past several months.
When my youngest son was in the hospital enduring bleed after bleed into his knee he would scream in pain for hours (this is not an exaggeration). It’s hard for a seven year old to understand that kind of pain, and all I could do was help monitor his medications, elevate his knee and use ice every 20 minutes and hold him. I would have done anything to take on his pain. Even two years later he lives with the damage done to his joints and residual arthritic pain.
I’ve always heard about people who live with chronic pain, like my best friend since 6th grade, “C”. She was in a horrific automobile accident in 2003 and has lived in pain ever since. I never understood what that really meant until pain became part of my life. When I am in the kind of pain where I want to slam my head into a brick wall, when my husband has to help me in the shower, and I honestly would rather not live another day, I sob…not only for myself but for my beautiful friend and my son. I had no idea.
When my parents died I felt an overwhelming grief. I didn’t think I would ever not feel that pain. There are days I feel that grief all over again and I am wracked with sorrow but I know that it will get better, eventually. My mother died over 19 years ago and my father 8.
Everyone experiences pain. Whether it is a type of physical pain that is acute or chronic or an emotional pain that breaks your heart. You can’t take a person’s pain away, but you can pray for them. And you definitely can’t compare them! Lend an ear and even give them time because sometimes the pain is so intense that all that person can do is breathe and even talking is not easy. Sometimes they have to back away simply because they are reserving their energies for the things that must be done. I am guilty of that.
The holiday season is here and I am determined to enjoy it as I anticipate the birth of Christ. This season I will keep those who suffer in pain (physical/emotional) close to my heart and at the top of my prayers.
Won’t you join me in doing the same?
Today I Am Thankful For:
- MRI’s
- A cold, blustery day
- Chap-stick
- Puppies
- candles
